I don’t write at a computer. Well, I write at a computer… eventually, but first I write in my head. While I’m walking, cycling, ironing, driving or lying in bed staring at the ceiling trying to sleep. Sometimes, a piece of music perfectly encapsulates a scene. I might even listen to these songs over and over, watching the scene play out in my head like a movie. Then, when I do write, it’s a flurry of fingers over the keyboard.

These are those songs.

WARNING - SPOILERS!!

Still here? That’s on you, mate.

Chapter 1

You’re hanging on by a thread, and one wrong move could snap it.

From Death by Mike Dean & Sarah Schachner

Chapter 2

Ripples slowly stilling.

Rolling Thunder by Anilah

Chapter 4

The moment you’ve waited for is everything you thought it would be.

“The wind surged under my wings, propelling me higher, until my entire field of vision was filled with the seamless blue sky.”

Everything In Its Right Place by Radiohead

Chapter 5

What have I done?

Sky Burial by Anilah

Chapter 8

Walking through the woods and seeing colours for the first time.

“Just past the meadow, the blanket of grass gave way to vertical brown cylinders, supporting a roof of green pins like an enormous living temple.”

Hoppípolla by Sigur Rós

Chapter 9

Struggling for control against your own urge to give in completely.

“I grabbed the wall behind me like it was some kind of tether to my old self, the one who was not affected in this way.”

Play with Fire by Sam Tinnesz

Chapter 14

“I stood, rooted to the ground, my ears straining for a sound beyond the noise of the wind whipping the grass.

I was alone.”

Forgive by Burial

Chapter 19

A bubble of joy.

A-Punk by Vampire Weekend

Chapter 24

A glimpse of another world, a lighter world, and if you could let go, you might even feel happy. But…

Show Me (feat. Hundred Waters) by Big Wild

Chapter 25

‘“It would be useful to help me understand your people.”

“So, you want to kiss for research purposes?”

I shrugged. “If it means you’ll do it.”’

Shut Up Kiss Me by Angel Olsen

Chapter 26

“The sky had cleared, and this far away from the light of Ona, a multitude of stars were visible. He lowered himself to lay the roof, and I lay beside him. The cold, hard shingles reminded me of my sleeping platform on Enan, but this bed had a view of the universe. I felt small and insignificant. It was freeing. Whatever I did in this world, those stars would burn the same as if I’d never existed.

Zed reached over and interlocked his fingers with mine, slowly caressing my hand with his thumb. I wondered if he’d ever brought a woman here. The thought tightened something in my chest. Perhaps Rokayya was right, and I was jealous.”

It Takes a Lot To Know a Man by Damien Rice

Chapter 28

“The moment he released my hair, I let my head fall forward.

And snapped it back again.

His nose crunched against the back of my skull.

So. Satisfying.”

Blood // Water by grandson

Chapter 31

Crossing that line and letting go of the person you used to be.

Put It on Me by Matt Maeson

Chapter 32-33

Finding belonging with someone, and the emptiness that follows after being betrayed by that person. Also, almost every scene with Zed.

“The heart is a soft muscle, unrelated to the limbic system in the brain, where emotions are experienced. Yet I felt it then, a crack in the centre of my chest.”

To Build a Home (feat. Patrick Watson) by The Cinematic Orchestra

Chapter 36

Mechanically going about your day while you are curling up inside yourself.

Hold Your Breath by Ruelle

Chapter 37

Sometimes getting what you always wanted makes you realise what you have lost.

You Cut Her Hair by Tom McRae

Empty Crown by YAS

Chapter 42

Finding your courage in insanity.

Mad Hatter by Melanie Martinez

Chapter 44

Limping to your death in defiance.

Motley Crue by Post Malone

Book II

Rise of the Seraph

Reborn into something new, the tables turn, and you march towards justice.

Inside by Chris Aventgarde & Red Rosamund